been a while since i updated this thing - it's always like that, isn't it? you'd think after the first thirty times i might bother to change, haha, but so it goes.

life is changing faster than i can keep up with, in all of the best ways and some of the more confusing and conflicting. sure, it's senior year, so that's always supposed to be a confusing time, but that doesn't really help the fact that, well, it is confusing. very much so.

yesterday i turned in my two weeks notice at Sylvan Learning Center, where i worked for a few months as a teacher's aide, giving teachers their books and doing other odd jobs around the office. feeling kind of conflicted about that, because it means that in two weeks i'm going to be out of work and won't get those regular paychecks.

but on the other hand, that job made me fucking miserable. with school and life and work... it's just too much. i don't deal well with stress, and i definitely don't function well if i'm constantly working all the time. i need my alone time, Fate, so fuck off.

when the two weeks are up though, i think things are going to get a little bit better. obviously we'll see. but it frees up time for me to work on my writing, and i desperately need that. there are a lot of things i need to write, and not enough time to sit down and write them. hopefully that'll change.

biggest thing on my mind?

my beautiful girlfriend, and the story she asked me to write. a story without blood or darkness, conveniently, and even optimistic if you can believe it. things are changing, and some of them for the better. on a functional level, it's good for me to be able to expand my talents to a different kind of story. on a deeper level, it feels good to be writing something for somebody that i care about so much instead of writing about hate. it's harder to write, but it's rewarding.

optimistic.
i'm feeling strangely optimistic.

if you've actually bothered to read this far, then i'd like to reward you with one of my new favorite pieces of writing. i've been reading the works of Megan Dipo (also a terrific Dark Artist) for a while now, and most definitely enjoying them, but this particular piece resonants on many different levels. i hope it makes you feel the same way it affects me.

enjoy, and let her know she's awesome.

[link]